I've been thinking...
... perhaps in the last twelve hours only... but
... I've been thinking. First I was thinking about motion. And then I was thinking about displacement.
... and stream of consciousness. Filling time. And what time is. A measure... and what encompasses a measure. And a minute... and what encompasses a minute. And how a measure seems long and then short. But then a minute is also long and short. Really, music is so fleeting, and both that measure and that minute happen and pass so without a moment of recognition.
Jesse asked, "Do you feel like you're thinking a lot when you're playing?"
Yes, and then also no. It depends on the day, it depends on the improv, it depends on my state of mind. But what matters more is the outcome, right? Or no? I've been feeling lately like it's important to have some structure... something to follow to keep things coherent. And when I'm really invested, there's an unforced "thinking" that happens that keeps me on track. But if I let myself completely wander, structure usually falls away. Now, whether that's for better or worse is another thing.
I dunno. Jesse?
Here we go, Day 108: https://ia700802.us.archive.org/20/items/Improv113011/11_30_113_19Pm.mp3
I bet the reason you're feeling that outcome is important is because you have a classical background. You've always been presenting finished compositions, most of which have been presented amazingly many times before by amazing pianists.
ReplyDeleteFor me, more important in improvisation is the process and the intent - the outcome is secondary. Perhaps it doesn't always lead to satisfaction for the listener, but I think there are moments in improvised music that blow everything else out of the water. Those moments are full of honest feelings. When I perform classical music, I usually have to reinvent feelings, because the honest feelings have been destroyed by practice. The only piece so far that wasn't like that for me was Messeian Vignt Regards XV. I loved it and felt it, and never stopped feeling it throughout the whole process. Some classical musicians learn repertoire faster than me, so it's probably easier for them to hold on to their original feelings until performance time. I take too long for that. In improvisation, the feelings are right there in the moment. Sometimes I lose focus and lose the feelings, but not too often.
Hmm. That's very interesting, Jesse. I think you're on to something. But I only partially agree with the classical music/invented feelings part. Sometimes, yes, those feelings have to be invented, but sometimes the music conveys exactly how we are already feeling inside... I think it's why we're drawn to play certain pieces at specific times in our days/lives. At least that's how it is for me. I definitely have a battery of pieces that come out when the moment requires it.
ReplyDeleteJust yesterday, I said to my student that one thing I really liked about his playing was the flexibility he has for making his pieces sound different every time... the phrasing, dynamics, and so forth. Course that can sometimes be a detriment, but it is nice to hear that he is inflecting his current moods and emotions rather than going for an "invented" one.
Thanks for the comments, Jesse!